Meet Alfie, Long Haired Tabby (Kristine is his human)
HOW A ‘CHANGE OF NAME’ MADE A DIFFERENCE
FAYE’S VALIDATION
Note: the ‘Validation’ process in Faye’s sessions is evidence that Faye is genuinely communicating with the animal. She knows nothing about the animal except breed and age – and only has a photo to refer to.
Alfie was named Diesel by a previous human. But you (Kristine) call him Alfie, which he responds much better to. He does his toileting inside because he was previously trapped inside before and HAD to do his toileting inside but prefers to do it outside. He also needs to feel safe. Alfie is very mistrustful of everyone.
(Kristine confirmed the above)
THE PROBLEM (KRISTINE’S PERSPECTIVE – his human)
We are fostering this little guy to try to get him comfortable around people so he can be adopted.
It’s interesting that you say he doesn’t like his name, Diesel. I have been calling him Alfred or Alfie a lot.
I wanted to know why he was doing his toileting inside the house and not using the litter tray.
He hides all the time during the day and only comes out at night, then he wants to be outside, we just can’t let him outside as foster parents in case he runs away.
I’d also like to know what he thinks of my other cat, Chrissy?
ALFIE’S CONVERSATION WITH FAYE
NEW NAME, NEW FEELING
He totally dislikes his name Diesel. It reminds him of the past where he wasn’t treated well. The name ‘Diesel’ brings back bad memories. He’s glad you have started to call him Alfie as it makes him feel more content and it sits well with him.
TRUST ISSUES
You can help Alfie by being in ‘the present moment’ with him when he’s hiding and feeling timid or scared. Alfie is a real softy with a gentle nature. The mistrust is from past trauma, where he was trapped and harassed by kids and teenagers. He hides because he feels trapped inside as in the past he was kept outside. If you have no expectations of what he should do or should be, and instead just give lots of love and cuddles he will eventually release the past and enjoy you and the family (if you choose to adopt him). The more you can help him adjust to new people the better – feelings of trust and peace will build. But this takes practice on your part. Alfie definitely wants to stay with you. Not to be adopted out to someone else.
PILL POPPING
The anti-depressant medication dispensed while at the Rescue Centre has made Alfie feel weak, unfocused and out of control. He felt scared because he didn’t recognise life as he knew it before the pills.
*Note: Faye is NOT suggesting stopping this medication, her account is only how Alfie feels about it.
NIGHT & NATURE
At the moment, Alfie is much more content and comfortable when outside in the dark. The daylight reminds him of past rough treatment and having to hide to be safe. Alfie may have some Maine Coon breed in him. Apart from being exceptionally loving and affectionate, Maine Coons enjoy roaming the outdoors. With support, cuddles and patience, Alfie is likely to display these human-loving and nature-loving traits. Also he prefers eliminating his waste in nature but needs to feel safe out there first. The Rescue Centre was the first time he experienced a litter tray.
THE ‘ESCAPE’
Alfie escaped from the house recently (confirmed by Kristine). This is because he felt your panic. He didn’t know how to stop this feeling, which scared him. Give Alfie a couple of weeks and he won’t run away. Take him outside in your arms and just sit with him, on the grass or a blanket, and just love on him with peace in yourself. Then let him go, pat him and stay with him don’t get freaked out if he wanders to the tree and sits by himself. He wants to be with you and be the new member of your family.
MY NEW SISTER
Chrissy is not causing him any distress. He’s fine with her. But because he wants to stay with this family, Chrissy is a bit scared she is going to be ‘second best’ – or that she will have to leave the family. It’s a bit like “What is HE doing here? I thought this was MY home?”
CO-TEACHING
Alfie is warming up to the idea that Chrissy is going to be his little sister, he can ‘show her the way’. He also likes the idea of a friend because he misses his mate from the past who he’s now separated from. Chrissy believes she can teach Alfie how to ‘come back’ after disappearing into the bushes and overcome his fear.
ALFIE’S SOLUTIONS
• He would like some kind of wire containment outside where he can be on grass, rocks and shrubs yet still be safe
• When he feels comfortable and safe, he will go to the toilet outside during the day
• Trust him when he wanders, he will return
• He wants to live with you and be Chrissy’s brother
• If you weren’t able to keep him yourself, be very careful about who took him (preferably an older female)
THE OUTCOME
Kristine: “Alfie has come a long way since talking to you. We have adopted him and he and Chrissy are endeavouring to become friends although he frightens her even when he doesn’t mean to. They do share each other’s space more and without aggression. Alfie has stopped doing his toileting in the house now and is a much more loving boy. Hearing Alfie’s solution that he would like some kind of containment outside in nature we built him a “catio” enclosure. It wasn’t until we decided to adopt and fully trust him that we let him out at night uncontained, and were rewarded with his return and trust in us! Thanks to Faye we now have a happy family.
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